For a large part of my middle school career, I relied on the people around me for my happiness. If I did
something and they laughed, it was a confidence boost. That worked for me. In middle school. I thought I was confident. I thought I had “real” friends. In reality, I was just a face in a crowd of people not making their own decisions. My whole view on confidence and friendships changed in high school.
It was a change that occurred over my first two years. The friends I believed were forever-friends found something “better,” and my confidence hit rock bottom. I didn’t realize, at the time, that the people leaving me were already toxic to my self-esteem. What I thought was them building my confidence up was actually them tearing it down to keep me feeling less than.
I didn’t have the slightest idea what true confidence was until I experienced it. Being involved in the performing arts helped me with that. I found friends that not only make me feel like I am wonderful to be
around, but they also make me want to be a better person. Being a part of diverse groups like theatre and choir helped me realize what I bring to the table is completely different from what the person next to me does. I realized how beautiful and unique I was. I decided then I didn’t want to blend into the crowd. I stopped walking down the pre-made trail of every follower before me. I wanted to be different. I wanted to be in the spotlight. So I’m creating my spotlight.